Self Perspectives

I perceive myself as every other individual other there, nothing special yet one individual who exists in many lives. I as person who strives to improve in all aspects of life, I am hard on myself in some ways. To be honest, I don't see what other people see in me but I see where they're coming from. It's hard to think of yourself as a special person who made tremendous impacts in people's life; although I have put certain people on such pedestal, which doesn't make sense. I believe there's a negative and positive balance to everything and life is about turning the balance into more of the positive energies that would work with you and not against you. Every lost comes with a gain and every end results in a beginning. Exits are there, it's up to you whether you want to take these opportunities or not.

But as humans, we like to dwell on past memories as substances to our beliefs. We walk, fall, get back up again and carry on; that's the cycle of life and it repeats. However, we tend to learn from the falls and prevent ourselves from walking the same path. some succeed better than others in this. Most people tend to repeat their mistakes and not realize it. It's in our nature and sometimes, we just can't control it.

I, like most people live in the past, which is not a good thing. As I live too deeply into the past, I forget that I'm actually in the present. Then it's already too late to realize because the present has become history. Floating between time isn't the greatest feeling but that's how I lived 22 year of my life and I accept it. I can't seem to see the future as it is such a mystery so I'm the type of person who lives by the day. Planning ahead doesn't work for me. Although, I get all frustrated when the time comes and I realize that I should have planned better. Oh well...

As a daughter, I am rebellious and disobedient. I have very poor communication with family members and as a parent, it takes a lot to get things out of me. I do things my way but you just got to know overall, I still really care about the family. 

As a sister, all you need to know is that I'll treat your babies like my own. I'm there for you anytime and any day. 

As a friend, I'm either the greatest or not your friend at all. So if I consider you a friend, I'll give my all. I'm very choosey when it comes to friends because I tend to give a lot more than I receive. If you don't deserve that, I'm sorry, you're outta my life. I'm there for you whenever you need a hand. Certain friends come first before anything.

As a girlfriend, I'm pretty demanding and possessive. If I like you enough, you'll receive my all but I expect half returned; in terms of the care and thought. My all is my life. Only gave it out once and afraid to try again. I could be a full package girlfriend if I try and adjust myself for you but you must be hell of a special guy. An ex boyfriend refers me as a lifetime regret. Another ex refers me as every guy's asset. But unfortunately, one ex refers me as the meanest girl ever. Hey, honesty hurts.

As a wife, I'm one of those who stands behind every successful man. I support my man behind any career they pursue and put my dreams aside to help them. You can pretty much call me a housewife but has her own social and career life. I can cook, yes an asset quality. But hell no, I'm not cleaning shit and I'm not gonna clean after a messy husband. I actually don't want to be a wife unless I know this guy would be a great husband and father.

As a mother, I can be strict and mean but overall, I believe I know how to raise a kid right. Kids don't need the best cause they shall learn the best for themselves. I'll let my child do whatever they want with minimal guidelines, even if I was to see them fall. They would only learn from their mistakes. These are priceless life lessons. As a kid, I was raised the hard way and it was thought to be better that way. I do expect a friendship from my child though, I'll try to make it happen.

As an aunt, I'm just like a strict mother. Right now, I have two nieces from my sister and another baby is on its way. My elder niece is like my own child. I raised this girl since I was 11, how can I ever forget?

As a boss, I'm either straight forward blunt and mean or carefree and nice. If it was my own business, then I'm the bitchiest boss you can ever ask for. I expect as much as I'll expect from a boyfriend. I don't need your 100% 24-7 but need your 100% from 9-5. I tend to give people chances but it's 2 strikes and you're out. I remember the first day walking into Mr. Chan's office, the Accounting Manager was fired by me. Of course I did my research about him before making that strike but it was literally one tick and he was gone. Everyone got scared of me after, thinking that I fired people for bias reasons. Those executives even went against my decisions, but who holds the shots here? Yes, me, I'm the boss.

As an employee, if I like the place enough and I see my second home here, I take ownership of the business. I constantly search for incentives to improve the setting, mostly to convenient the regulations in the business. Two of my bosses can prove that.